The Right to Drive

Almost funny. An eyewitness account. While sitting in the back yard having my morning coffee, I heard a loud crash and tires squealing. As I jumped up I saw a high-cg SUV suddenly enter the alley doing a hard left turn. Its right front tire blew and it continued doing a hard left into Aldi’s Foods parking lot and came to a halt. I ran over just as a man got out on the passengers side. I asked if anyone was hurt. He just said “The brakes failed. The brakes failed.” A woman was still behind the wheel. I asked “Did you hit the fence?” He said “Yes.” Evidently, and from a parked position in Aldi’s parking lot, she did the following, all in a single motion:

She put the vehicle into drive;

She accelerated full throttle;

She jumped the curb/car stop;

She took out a large section of very sturdy metal fence;

She burned rubber onto the sidewalk;

She entered the traffic lane on the street.

Continuing in a very tight left-hand circle, she entered the alley;

Leaning precariously, she blew the right front tire;

She reentered Aldi’s parking lot;

She came to a halt in nearly the very same spot she started from.

Another car was parked along side hers in the lot but was left untouched safely within the tight circle she had just described with her vehicle.

Since no one was hurt I went about my business.

A little while later I walked over to examine the carnage. The fence was down and there were tire marks on the sidewalk. The SUV’s tire was flat. The vehicle had been moved a few feet but was taking up two parking spaces. I then noticed the steering wheel had a safety device clamped on it. I think it was originally called The Club. Made of hardened steel, it locks onto the steering wheel to prevent it from turning and thus prevent the vehicle from being stolen.

From all I saw and heard I strongly suspect that, instead of backing slowly out of the parking space – she drove forward with “the pedal to the metal” with The Club still in place.

There is no substitute for stupidity.

About The Twentieth Man

Age 69
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